My husband and I have felt led to adopt for years. We planned more for adoption than we did the two crazy kiddos playing on my patio right now! We try to talk to our oldest son about adoption frequently. Although he is only three, we want him to understand as much as possible!
The other night I was praying with him before bed. That night he wanted to pray for his “new brother” (he wants a brother so he can play football with him and tackle him). While we were praying tears poured down my checks.
“Mommy, how you crying?” (always replace “how” with “why”- a little “Trey-nese” language lesson!) I tried my best to explain that even though we have not met his “new brother”, I love him very much. I explained that I wanted him to come live with us. I said, “Trey, if you didn’t live in our house, I would cry all the time because I would miss you and I would want you to be at home with me. “Mommy is crying because, even though I haven’t meet him, I want your new brother to be at home with us,” I tried to explain.
Trey pondered this statement in his little three year old brain. I’m sure he was and is very confused at all of this adoption talk. I know he is just interested in having a live-in football teammate and car racing buddy. He probably thinks his mommy is nuts (and he’s probably right)!
He then looked up and said something so simple but so profound, “But Mommy, I do live here with you.” I smiled, cried some more, gave him a kiss on the forehead and told him he was right and I was so glad he did!
With him tucked away in bed, I sat down at my desk where I had traces of various project draped around my little area. All of these projects were started with the intention to raise money for adoption. The last month or so adoption has dominated my mind and heart. Although it is a very good thing, I think it has consumed me! As I sat there the gravity of Trey’s words hit me. “But I do live with you.” I had done it again! I had gotten so focused on what was ahead, I was starting to miss what God has given me here and now.
It is a difficult balance but I don’t want to miss what is going on today because I am focused on tomorrow! God has already blessed me tremendously! I want to be thankful for today and trust him with tomorrow.